Friday, 1 February 2008
I am confused. I really do not know what is right and what is wrong in life right now. Everything I do turns out wrong. So why should I even bother doing the right thing. Right now, I just feel like I do not even want to be alive. How I wish I was dead. I hate being blamed for something I did not do. I just hate it. Why is it that when I talk to someone nicely, they do not want to listen and when I scold them or shout at them, they think I am bossy and rude? They even get angry with me just because I am taking up a responsibility. Why is it so hard for some people to see others happy? I just hate school so much. How I wish I never meet anyone at all and never to be schooling. Just wishing home-schooled exist in Singapore.
To: the anonymous person who wrote to me the letter in school.
Who ever you are, I guess my blog is the only way to actually reply you. I think I recognize the hand writing from somewhere but I do not want to accuse anybody. If you are reading this, I am just glad you did. First of all, I swear to god I did not shout ‘shut up’ to anyone at anytime during this month. I swear. All I say was please keep quiet. That is it. Why would I want to shout ‘shut up’ when there is a so much better way to say what I meant? Well, I do not know how you actually figure out that it was me who shouted ‘shut up.’ I believed that happen during Social Studies class at computer lab 3 when someone shouted it. Just so you know I heard it too. I guess I was the first person that appears in your mind because I am the class monitress and it was my duty to keep the class quiet. But, seriously it was not me. Whatever it is, I just want you to know that it was not me. Moving on, I do not shout to express my anger or bad mood. If you were in my shoe, well, if you talk to them nicely and they do not listen to you, off course you get frustrated and sometimes things just happen.
PS: I do not want to argue about anything right now. I just wish I do not exist in your life. But unfortunately I just have to face it. It is life and bad things always happen. And I am sorry if what I did ever hurt you. The question is why are you afraid to tell me your name? Tell me, what I have done to you that makes you hate the things I do or say? And by the way, what does it have to do with my brothers? Why do you have to bring them up against the whole thing happening in school? You basically do not know the relationship between my brothers and I. So, ya. That is all I got to say. Nothing more, I do not want to make this so called small matter big. Hope you actually understand what I am going through in life. Sorry if anything here I said offended you.
CHEERS&SMILES~
I am STRESS! PROBLEMS! PROBLEMS! PROBLEMS! Every where I go there is PROBLEM! One by one comes to me. Seriously can’t they ever see me happy? Not even once? I am glad today’s dance practice is not a bad one. So glad, seriously glad. I have been home late for two days in a row. And tomorrow, I am also going home late as I need to get the shirt for Chinese New Year performance which is next Wednesday. I totally in love with the dance steps that I do not mind doing it over and over again. WHOA! Luckily there is no homework due tomorrow. So, basically right now I am RESTING! STRESSING OUT! over PROBLEMS! I want to cry! :P Alright that is all I have for today. Just need a moment to express my feelings. And ya I just did. :)
CHEERS&SMILES~
